Kids... Precious gifts from God...
I never used to like kids. I couldn't stand being around kids. I found them noisy, irritating and I could never understand what joy you can possibly get out of having them around. So, naturally, children were not part of my family planning when I first got married.
Incidentally... both my daughters were born out of 'accidents'. I first got pregnant in January 2002. When I learnt of the news, I did not know what to feel. I was lost, confused and it was totally not within my plans. But abortion is not an option for me because I know that every life was purchased by the life of Christ Himself and I have no right whatsoever to deprive anyone of a chance to live. Babies in their mothers' wombs could experience the emotions of the mother, so I told Derrick that since I've been given a child, I'll not let my baby feel rejected or unwelcomed. I started talking to it and welcomed it to my family. But 2 weeks later, I lost the baby in a miscarriage. I did not feel sad initially, I did not think I was capable of developing any kind of affection whatsoever with this half-formed foetus that I could hardly feel. But later the same day, after the operation to evacuate the womb, the loss set in and on my way out of the theatre, I cried... uncontrollably.
2 months later, I found that I got pregnant again. I was not overjoyed at the news because, I was totally unprepared. But I made up my mind to welcome the baby all the same. The first pregnancy was not very easy on me. I had insomnia, morning sicknesses, I lost 3 kgs during the first trimester. All these before I knew I could have asked God for an easy pregnancy. I asked Him for a supernatural delivery though and that was what He gave me. A speedy delivery, without epidural or pain killers of any kind and without episiotomy. It was a miraculous moment and as I held my baby, I was overwhelmed with emotions. Imagine the thrill God had when he created Man and said... "It is very good."
My second baby came 15 months later... again... totally unplanned. (Then again, if everything was as I had planned, I would have no babies to begin with.) This time round, I had a very smooth pregnancy and delivery was just as miraculous, and faster.
Children are not God's punishment for us. There is an email in circulation that advocates that. Instead, having children lets us experience what He goes through with us. As humans, we are imperfect. But we have parental instincts and we know how to love our children. We know that we have to provide for them and care for them. How much more then, would our heavenly Father love us, care for us and provide for us? He, being an omnipotent, omniscience, omnipresence and perfect God... when I feel the love I have for my children, how much I long to spend time with them, to feel their love for me and know that they miss me when I'm not around; know how much they need me and depend on me, I can understand... most certainly not to the fullest... how God feels about us. Why we make Him feel good when we depend on Him, need Him, spend time with Him, love Him and miss him. It's all about the heart of a parent.
Being a parent also means that you have the responsibility of disciplining your children. Since Chloe was about one and a half years old, when she was able to understand authority and cause and consequence, we introduced her to Mr Cane. We both believe in the "spare the rod and spoil the child" theory. As Pastor Prince said, you don't cane the child out of anger, cane the child when you are calm and with a purpose. This way, you can control the amount of force you use... and never hit a child with your bare hands. You hands must be associated with touches of encouragement and love; and discipline only when the child is defiant and challenging your authority. Indeed... after a couple of encounters with Mr Cane, we did not have to use it much. Chloe understands perfectly the consequences of misbehaving. It was not easy on us when we used the cane. But we knew that it was for her good that we do it. But when the cane landed on her, our heart ached even more. Imagine what went through His mind when He meted out the ultimate punishment on His Beloved Son? Jesus did not even deserve it. God must have felt the excruciating pain in His heart. Today, God doesn't whack us anymore because Christ had bore all our punishments on the cross. God had given to us His Holy Spirit to dwell within us to lead us and guide us. But He speaks to us in that still small voice and assures us with that peace in our hearts.
Parenthood had changed my perception of God in a big way and today, I thank God for the precious gifts of my daughters.
Incidentally... both my daughters were born out of 'accidents'. I first got pregnant in January 2002. When I learnt of the news, I did not know what to feel. I was lost, confused and it was totally not within my plans. But abortion is not an option for me because I know that every life was purchased by the life of Christ Himself and I have no right whatsoever to deprive anyone of a chance to live. Babies in their mothers' wombs could experience the emotions of the mother, so I told Derrick that since I've been given a child, I'll not let my baby feel rejected or unwelcomed. I started talking to it and welcomed it to my family. But 2 weeks later, I lost the baby in a miscarriage. I did not feel sad initially, I did not think I was capable of developing any kind of affection whatsoever with this half-formed foetus that I could hardly feel. But later the same day, after the operation to evacuate the womb, the loss set in and on my way out of the theatre, I cried... uncontrollably.
2 months later, I found that I got pregnant again. I was not overjoyed at the news because, I was totally unprepared. But I made up my mind to welcome the baby all the same. The first pregnancy was not very easy on me. I had insomnia, morning sicknesses, I lost 3 kgs during the first trimester. All these before I knew I could have asked God for an easy pregnancy. I asked Him for a supernatural delivery though and that was what He gave me. A speedy delivery, without epidural or pain killers of any kind and without episiotomy. It was a miraculous moment and as I held my baby, I was overwhelmed with emotions. Imagine the thrill God had when he created Man and said... "It is very good."
My second baby came 15 months later... again... totally unplanned. (Then again, if everything was as I had planned, I would have no babies to begin with.) This time round, I had a very smooth pregnancy and delivery was just as miraculous, and faster.
Children are not God's punishment for us. There is an email in circulation that advocates that. Instead, having children lets us experience what He goes through with us. As humans, we are imperfect. But we have parental instincts and we know how to love our children. We know that we have to provide for them and care for them. How much more then, would our heavenly Father love us, care for us and provide for us? He, being an omnipotent, omniscience, omnipresence and perfect God... when I feel the love I have for my children, how much I long to spend time with them, to feel their love for me and know that they miss me when I'm not around; know how much they need me and depend on me, I can understand... most certainly not to the fullest... how God feels about us. Why we make Him feel good when we depend on Him, need Him, spend time with Him, love Him and miss him. It's all about the heart of a parent.
Being a parent also means that you have the responsibility of disciplining your children. Since Chloe was about one and a half years old, when she was able to understand authority and cause and consequence, we introduced her to Mr Cane. We both believe in the "spare the rod and spoil the child" theory. As Pastor Prince said, you don't cane the child out of anger, cane the child when you are calm and with a purpose. This way, you can control the amount of force you use... and never hit a child with your bare hands. You hands must be associated with touches of encouragement and love; and discipline only when the child is defiant and challenging your authority. Indeed... after a couple of encounters with Mr Cane, we did not have to use it much. Chloe understands perfectly the consequences of misbehaving. It was not easy on us when we used the cane. But we knew that it was for her good that we do it. But when the cane landed on her, our heart ached even more. Imagine what went through His mind when He meted out the ultimate punishment on His Beloved Son? Jesus did not even deserve it. God must have felt the excruciating pain in His heart. Today, God doesn't whack us anymore because Christ had bore all our punishments on the cross. God had given to us His Holy Spirit to dwell within us to lead us and guide us. But He speaks to us in that still small voice and assures us with that peace in our hearts.
Parenthood had changed my perception of God in a big way and today, I thank God for the precious gifts of my daughters.
posted by Bubbz at 9:39 pm
1 Comments:
aiyo... made me have that impulse to want to have get married and have babies ! hahaha..
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